You're not going to believe this....

Greetings, foxy bitches!

I have been gone.. Forever.

You see, I was abducted. Abducted and forced to live in a tent in someone's backyard. Or maybe not someone, maybe it was aliens. I was abducted and kept in an alien tent city. I was abducted and kept in an alien tent city where I was not allowed any modern electronic devices. Only 8 tracks and a Victrola. I tried to reach you through my typewriter but to no avail.

So I am back. I am sure you were beside yourself with worry ( Oh Rambler, how I have missed you as well) but I would not have seen your doubtless candle light vigils, that one disastrous seance when you had given up hope, nor even your endless supply of missing persons posters, for I was in space.

I would love to put this traumatic, traumatic extraterrestrial experience behind me and begin to write again, anew. If there's anyone still out there.....